Friday, 2 November 2018

Why anxiety is real and not fake!!!

Why anxiety is real and not fake!!!

So I don't know about some of you, but I'm just about sick of having to defend myself on a daily bases regarding my anxiety it's not a choice to feel this way, I don't like it, and I don't act this way for fun. I cannot  help feeling like something catastrophic is about to happen, I cannot help feeling unable to enjoy myself because I don't want anybody to feel embarrassed by my awkwardness, question why I'm mumbling and shaking, wonder why I'm staring at the floor trying to focus on my breathing because I'm feeling trapped in a large crowd. Each day is a struggle I'll feel inflated and happy one minute then without warning I'll suddenly feel those nervous butterflies in my stomach,  and start to remember something I haven't done, or something I've said, It's not a temporary thing, it's constant every hour of the day nonstop.

People usually confuse anxiety with nerves but that's certainly not the case, nerves go away after a particular situation has resolved the panic you feel is gone and you feel calm. With anxiety, it never leaves you every minute, every hour, every day it's on your mind the whole time, even if there is no reason to be worrying, something in your head will cause unnecessary fear and your mind will ask the constant question of 'what ifs.' When you are feeling this way, it's incredibly hard to concentrate on anything it affects your ability to sleep, eat, and maintain relationships.

Aside from the endless worrying, there is also plenty of physical symptoms that accompany it such as

  • Headaches
  • feeling sick
  • Tiredness
  • Shortness of breath
  • Aching Muscles
  • Palpitations
  • Dizziness
  • Irritability
  • Unable to focus
  • Sweating
  • Shaking
  • Insomnia
  • Trouble Breathing 

There are many times where anxiety and just feeling nervous are very different, for example... 

Waking up in the morning feeling scared about a big meeting at work, or scared to attend a job interview, that's nerves. However, waking up feeling powerless to move along with a sense of dread can make you seriously contemplate turning over and going straight back to sleep, or frantically attempting to come up with some excuse to not attend. The idea of having to endure that hell, makes your heart pound, it honestly takes about an hour before you have to force yourself out of bed and even when you do your mind is constantly racing. 

I walk my son to school each morning and I'm always staring down at the ground or ill be fidgeting with something in my pocket to try and look busy. You most probably wouldn't even be worried if you haven't got anxiety you're only walking down the street. Anxiety makes you dread seeing anyone especially if somebody is walking towards you, can practically feel the way they're judging you, it makes you feel incredibly insecure about yourself. 

If you're at a social event and have those butterflies in your tummy that's nerves, when you have anxiety and have the same butterflies, it makes you feel physically sick. You feel too scared to have even a drop of alcohol in case something happens to you, you feel too insecure to dance, everyone speeding past makes it feel like your standing incredibly still and nobody is acknowledging you, sometimes you'll go to the bathroom to try and compose yourself all you want to do is go home.  

When you're feeling unwell, you can feel nervous and wonder what's wrong until you go to a doctor and they put your mind at ease. But with anxiety, you obsess over every small symptom, you scroll the internet and see the worst case scenarios and begin to convince yourself that you're dangerously ill. If you visit a doctor, you'll not take their word for it and start to panic and assume the worst Its constant worry repeating over and over in your mind. 

So anxiety and nerves are very different as I mentioned earlier nerves disappear, anxiety doesn't. It never leaves your mind the easiest day to day tasks feel so difficult to achieve. Rather than assume we're faking it try and be there for one another, you never know when someone is hurting. Some people put on a brave face but are struggling to get through each day. xx

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