Friday, 21 December 2018

Socially anxious at Christmas? try these simple and effective tips to cope.

Socially anxious at Christmas? try these simple and effective tips to cope.

Are you dreading the awkward Christmas conversations? Are you imagining how uncomfortable you're going feel when you have to sit with all the family, playing games, eating dinner and opening presents with everyone's eyes glaring at you? Are you already envisioning what you're going to say to that elusive distant relative? well, you're certainly not alone it's incredibly nerve-racking and honestly, makes me want to stay at home and not visit anyone.

As I've said in a previous post, I've always liked Christmas and always tried my best to make it amazing but dealing with anxiety makes it near on impossible. My family, friends, and in-laws are very much looking forward to seeing one another enjoying some drinks, playing games such as monopoly or charades and handing out presents. Which is all great but its the small talk in between that scares me, having to find something to speak about whilst trying my hardest to not stumble over my words and unintentionally embarrass myself by saying something stupid.

I've sat staring into space each night, trying to come up with an excuse to stay at home and not put myself through the whole scary situation but being a mother, I cannot put my child through the same anxious childhood I endured. So I really must find a way to keep calm and content which is why I've come up with a list of discreet ways I can help myself without drawing any attention to myself take a look below.

Don't Overthink

Let's face it overthinking ruins everything instead of doing this try your utmost hardest to empty your mind and refuse to listen to your anxiety. People often go with with the flow and don't imagine every situation in their heads before it's happened so try to understand that nobody is laughing at you, nobody is talking about you, and nobody is judging you. If somebody wants to speak to you, there's no ulterior motive they just want to make kind, pleasant conversation and we can definitely do that.

Deep breaths

You can take deep breaths, without attracting any attention to yourself, I do this all the time, just breath in really deep, and breath out. Do this as often as you like and if you find yourself sitting down feeling that nervous panicking feeling building inside, then excuse yourself and go to the bathroom, lock the door and just breath for a few minutes until you compose yourself. Deep breaths work wonders.

Opening presents

When it comes to opening presents try to give your gifts out at the same time as this will keep whoever brought you a gift busy, and you can open yours, without everyone watching your reactions. However, if you do find yourself in that horrible situation when you're the only one receiving a present, then wait until everyone's talking amongst themselves then open it.

Eating dinner

When its time for dinner, try to sit with somebody you feel comfortable with, and can have a good conversation with that way you will feel more at ease and can eat confidently. There is nothing worse than feeling uncomfortable eating in front of people. 

Limit alcohol

I understand its so tempting because alcohol can make you feel much more relaxed. But you will most probably get so drunk and start talking nonsense in front of people, which can cause so much embarrassment especially the following day when people tell you exactly what you said. I'm not saying don't have any because I for one know its like magic when you cant loosen up but just have a few glasses until you're comfortable enough to chat confidently then switch to something else. 

Go home when you want

I normally have to stay at families houses over Christmas because of travel, but it always worries me so much I don't want to stay out I never feel comfortable I end up sitting there wishing I was home and upsetting myself. If you feel this way, then this year arrange a lift home or save some money for a taxi if you live close enough. You don't have to stay out if you don't want to. 

Christmas is supposed to be a happy, feel-good experience with good company and no stress. So let's not let our anxiety ruin yet another year, let's make this one a good one filled with joy and Christmas spirit. Use these steps above if your feeling unable to enjoy yourself, Im, definitely going to. Will you be trying any of these out?  

If this helped you then please share, comment and subscribe to my blog or follow for future updates xx

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